Looking Glass
by slidinglamps
Summary: While at the swamp, Kuvira decides to take a walk and finds herself. Entry for Kuvira Week, day four.


Author's Note:

 _Day Four of Kuvira Week with the themes of dancing/weakness. I tried to go with weakness, but this story isn't really focused about Kuvira being weak but whatever. It fits the theme. Sort of._

* * *

It had not been her idea to stop at the Spirit Swamp, but Baatar had insisted on checking it out to see if the vines would be of any use for the little project they were working on. If there had been other options for spirit vines, she would have politely asked Baatar to stop there instead, but the only other place either of them could think of was Republic City, and she wasn't about to go marching into the city where all of the world leaders were gathered just to obtain some spirit vines.

She watched intensely as Baatar nailed his energy detector into the rooms of the tree, and as she did, she realized she had forgotten to wear her gloves. The gloves weren't a huge deal to her, but they served a purpose of making her seem more authoritative and in control. Or, at least, that's what Baatar claimed their purpose was. At first, the idea of wearing gloves was ridiculous, especially when she was in the middle of a fight and gloves restricted her hand movement slightly. Over time, she broke into the gloves and they fit her perfectly, stretching when necessary but still keeping good form.

Kuvira watched uneasily as the mech suits began to saw into the tree's roots. There was an odd chilling sensation surrounding her that made the hairs on her neck and arms stand up, and she had told Baatar she was going for a short walk. He had shot her a worried look, and she was quick to assure him that she would be safe and didn't need him to accompany her or have a small guard walk with her.

The minute she could no longer hear the saws sawing, she knew she had made a wrong choice by taking the walk. Even though she could clearly remember it being sunny when she had left, the swamp was dark and mysterious. She could hear the snapping jaws of catgators, and she had to remind herself that they would only attack if they felt threatened or were hungry.

Kuvira was about to turn to head back to her army when a loud, high pitched woman's scream cut across her. It was blood curling, and Kuvira had goosebumps running all over her arms. Forgetting her army, she took off into a sprint towards the sound.

Vines and hanging plants got in her way and she whacked them out of her path. The scream would stop, and then a few seconds later it would start up again. A few yards ahead, she could see a stream of sunlight through a bunch of vines, and on the other side, she could just vaguely make out a human body hunched over. By the time she had made it to the vines, her boots were soaking wet and there was mud trailing all on her boots and up to her knee cap.

She pulled back the vine curtain and did a quick double take. The woman screaming was wearing the exact same outfit she was, but there were gashes on her arms and there was a crimson stain on her stomach and her wrists were handcuffed together.

Kuvira's hands shook slightly as she reached out to touch the mirage of herself, but before she could, her reflection raised her head up slowly. Where her eyes should have been were just dark, empty sockets. The sight made Kuvira stumble back. She tripped on a rock and landed in the water.

The reflection stood and as it approached her, it slowly changed to a twenty one year old version of herself. The reflection donned the Zaofu guard uniform, the helmet with the captain's C gleaming proudly in the sunlight. It then changed again to fifteen year old Kuvira. The reflection's hair was tucked back into a braid like how she used to wear it, and it donned the attire that Kuvira had worn back then. When it was only a few steps away, it changed again to a small eight year old. The child's eyes, though empty sockets, were wide and if there were eyeballs in it, Kuvira would have predicted that the eyes would have been full of fear and paranoia. When it reached its little eight year old hand out to her, Kuvira screamed.

On cue, the reflection vanished, and Kuvira remained sitting in the water. She barely felt the coldness numbing her skin, but instead she stared at the spot where it had disappeared. She could feel her heart beating wildly in her chest, as if it was telling her that it needed out. Her breathing was heavy, and with each exhale, she was brought closer to tears.

She could hear the sloshing of multiple people's boots through the water, and tried to regain her composure to no avail. Even when Baatar had dismissed the troops that followed him and had his arms wrapped tightly around her, she didn't calm down. They sat together on the side of the river bank. Kuvira sat in his lap in a way that they faced each other, and she had buried her face into his shoulder and sobbed quietly while he rubbed small circles into her back.

"Don't take this the wrong way," Baatar said softly. "But after so long of you just being stoic, I'm glad to see you crying."

Kuvira sniffled and wiped her nose on the sleeve of her uniform. Baatar gently wiped the tears off of her cheeks and then wrapped his arms around her again. Her hands gripped the upper part of his sleeves tightly, and she rested her chin on his shoulder. She had bent the metal plates off for comfort purposes, and they reflected brightly when the sunlight hit them.

"Are you going to tell me what has you all upset, though?" Baatar asked.

There was a long silence, and then Kuvira nodded. She pushed herself away from Baatar's chest and stared down at her hands. Baatar gently played with her hair as she hiccupped and took deep breaths.

"I saw a reflection of myself," Kuvira said quietly.

"Of yourself?" Baatar asked, his eyebrows furrowing as he tried to work out the possibilities.

Kuvira nodded and picked at the skin around her thumbs. "Her eyes were soulless and empty. They—they were just _holes_ , Baatar."

"And it scared you?"

"Yes, it scared me a lot." Kuvira looked up from her hands and tilted her head. "Am _I_ just a soulless and empty person now?"

Baatar pursed his lips and shook his head. "No—no I wouldn't say _soulless_ , that's a little overkill."

"But I am empty?"

Baatar laughed and wrapped his arms around her. "I wouldn't use 'empty' to describe you. You've accomplished more in the past three years than what any of us could have ever imagined." He tilted his head slightly. "Do you feel empty about your accomplishments?"

Kuvira hesitated before shaking her head. Baatar leaned back and braced himself with his hands. He furrowed his brows in concern and pursed his lips. "Seriously, Kuvira, it's fine if you do. I'll just have to find some way to make you feel full about them."  
Kuvira shook her head and played with the buttons on his tunic. "It's not that—honestly Baatar, I'm telling you the truth, don't give me that look—but it's just, the first reflection—"

"There was more than one reflection?" Baatar asked, disbelief apparent in his voice.

Kuvira nodded and concentrated on buttoning and unbuttoning Baatar's highest button, trying to steady her shaking hands. "It was me, but she was wounded and handcuffed." Kuvira took in a shaky breath before continuing. "And she just looked so _weak_. And then it changed to past versions of myself and ended when I was eight."

"You saw your life flash backwards?"

"Baatar, I'm being _serious_."

Baatar held his hands up in surrender. "I know, it's a lot to take in though. So you're upset because you saw yourself weakened?"

Kuvira nodded and placed her hands in her lap. "It reminded me of the fight with the Avatar. The minute she went into the Avatar state—Baatar, I was a rag doll. She just tossed me around."

As if on instinct, Baatar's hand reached out to touch the scar on her shoulder where she had been hurt during the fight. "But you won't have to feel weak anymore, not with the spirit weapon." Baatar's lips curled up into a smile. "I could make it into a giant mech. You'd tower over everyone, and it would be made of platinum so it would be impenetrable."

"Baatar, that's a ridiculous—"

"I'm serious, Kuvira. I could do it. And we've got an abundance of platinum now, since we dismantled Mother's domes."

"But no one's ever made a giant mech before," Kuvira said.

"There's always a first." Baatar gave her a pointed look. "You're not doubting my engineering skills now, are you?"

Kuvira shook her head. "Of course not. It's just—the idea of it, it's insane."

"We're all a little insane." Baatar smiled slightly. "In all seriousness, I can do it."

"What would you have me do? March into Republic City?"

"Exactly. Kuvira—no, Kuvira, don't look at me like that. We've already made plans to invade the United Republic, why not do it in style?"

Kuvira hesitated, and then nodded. "Just promise me one thing."  
"What?"

"You won't let Zhu Li know you're working on it."  
"Of all—Kuvira, she swore loyalty to the Empire."  
Kuvira shook her head and gripped Baatar's shoulders. "She gives me this off feeling. And—and the last time I had an off feeling was the night Su and the twins tried to assassinate me."

Baatar's face softened, and he slowly nodded. "I'll only let her work on the weapon part. She won't ever know about the mech."

Kuvira nodded, and Baatar raised his eyebrows. "Are you ready to head back to the camp or do you just want to sit here?"

"We should head back. I don't want the soldiers—especially the generals—to be getting any false ideas by the two of us staying here for so long."

Kuvira got off of Baatar's lap and stood. Her legs were stiff from sitting for so long, but she extended a hand out to Baatar and he took it. His eyes glanced down at it and he tilted his head. "No gloves today?"

"I forgot to put them on," Kuvira said. "It's just like you to notice it _now_ and not before."

Baatar rolled his eyes and Kuvira metalbent his shoulder pads back on. "I didn't notice because you were crying and I had to do _something_. I wasn't going to focus on a very minor detail in your wardrobe."

Kuvira scoffed at him and Baatar gently kissed her forehead. Kuvira bit her lower lip and glanced around the swamp. "Do you even know how to get back?"

"We're not too far from the others, actually," Baatar said. "Maybe a half mile or so out."

Kuvira groaned and crossed her arms. "I don't want the reflection to return."

"I'll protect you from it."

They began to walk back to the base, and Baatar talked animatedly about how he was going to construct the giant mecha suit. "Maybe we can call it the Colossus," he suggested. "It'll be the colossal of colossuses."

"There hasn't been one before," Kuvira said. "So obviously it'll be the biggest one."

"You know _exactly_ how to ruin my fun," Baatar said.

She rolled her eyes, and a couple of yards away she could make out the Empire blimps and mecha suits. She earthbent the mud off of her and Baatar's uniforms and before they were in sight of their soldiers, she grabbed Baatar's arm.

"Baatar—can you promise me something else?"

"Of course."

"You won't—we won't—I can't become that reflection of myself." Kuvira choked on the words, and Baatar nodded in understanding.

"It won't happen," Baatar said. "I wouldn't allow it."

Kuvira nodded and pursed her lips. Baatar gestured for her to lead the rest of the way, and as she climbed up the roots of the banyangrove tree, she felt as if the reflections of herself were still watching her, waiting for the mistake she would make that would then make her one of them.


End file.
